Sardar race

Two Sardarjis, both student of I.I.T, Kanpur, were talking about the American Astronauts.

One said to the other, “What’s the big deal about going to the moon-anybody can go to the moon. We are sardars we will go direct to the sun.”

“But if we get within 13 million miles from the sun, we’ll melt.”

And the first answered, “So what, we’ll go at night.”

Technical jokes for all

Tech Jokes: THE COMPUTER HELPDESK PHONE SERVICE
Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one…
******
Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can’t get my diskette out.
Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it’s really stuck.
Helpdesk: That doesn’t sound good; I’ll make a note..”
Customer: No … wait a minute… I hadn’t inserted it yet..it’s still on my desk… Sorry…
******
Helpdesk: Click on the ‘my computer’ icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
******
Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you?
Customer: Hello… I can’t print.
Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and…
Customer: Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on me! I’m not Bill Gates damn it!
******
Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print. Every time I try, it says ‘Can’t find printer’.
I’ve even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can’t find it…
******
Customer: I have problems printing in red…
Helpdesk: Do you have a colour printer?
Customer: Aaaah……………….Thank you.
******
Helpdesk: What’s on your monitor now ma’am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.
******
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Helpdesk: Are you sure it’s plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can’t get behind the computer.
Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
Customer: Okay.
Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes.
Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there’s another one here. Ah…that one does work!
******
Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, and the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?
******
A customer couldn’t get on the Internet
Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes I’m sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
******
Helpdesk: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.
Helpdesk: That’s not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry…Internet Explorer.
******
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has put a screensaver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!
*******
Helpdesk: How may I help you?
Customer: I’m writing my first e-mail.
Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

Sardarji Jokes

A Sardarji and an American are seated next to each other on a flight from Los Angeles to New York. The American asks if he would like to play a fun game.

The Sardarji, tired, just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks.

The American persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He says, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me five dollars, and vice versa.”

Again, he declines and tries to get some sleep.

The American, now agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5,and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.”

This catches the Sardarji’s attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game.

The American asks the first question: “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?”

The Sardarji doesn’t say a word, reaches into his wallet,pulls out a $5.00 bill, and hands it to the American.

“Okay,” says the American, “your turn”.

He asks, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?”

The American, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer & searches all his preferences……..no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress… no answer.

Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers but to no avail.

After an hour, he wakes the Sardarji and hands him $500.

The Sardarji thanks him and turns back to get some more sleep.

The American, who is more than a little miffed, stirs the Sardarji and asks, “Well, what’s the answer?”

Without a word, the Sardarji reaches into his purse,hands the american $5,and goes back to sleep.

Poor government

A little boy wanted Rs.50 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing
happened. Finally he decided to write God a letter requesting the Rs.50.
When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, INDIA,
they decided to forward it to the President of India as a joke.

The President was so amused, that he instructed his secretary to send
the little boy Rs.20. The President thought this would appear to be a
lot of money to a little boy, and he did not want to spoil the kid. The
little boy was delighted with Rs.20, and decided to write a thank you
note to God, which read:

“Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money.
However, I noticed that you sent it through the Rashtrapati Bhavan
in New Delhi, and those donkeys deducted Rs.30 in taxes …”

nice jokes for u alll

Girlfriend: And are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday

Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?

Manager: Sorry, but i can’t give u a job. I don’t need much help.
Job Applicant: That’s all right. In fact I’m just the right person in this case. You
see, I won’t be of much help anyway!!

Dad: Son, what do u want for ur birthday?
Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.

Diner: I can’t eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It’s no use. He won’t eat it either.

Diner: You’ll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don’t expect to walk there, do you?

Husband: U know, wife, our son got his brain from me.
Wife: I think he did, I’ve still got mine with me!

Man: Officer! There’s a bomb in my garden!
Officer: Don’t worry. If no one claims it within three days, you can keep it.

Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That’s why I say she’s no good!

Hello world!

Welcome to WordPress.com. This is your first post. Edit or delete it and start blogging!